So the ipods in our house have become so much more than devices the kids play with.

They have become the biggest bargaining chip Greg and I have ever had the privilege of playing.

We threaten to take away the kid’s ipods more often than we brush our teeth (that means at least once every other day).

I now feel as though we are depending on the power of the ipod removal more than the kids are on the games they play, the music they listen to and the stickers they adorn on the already decorative cases.

Here are ten things that have been said in our house in an aggressive campaign for Greg and I (parents) to take our power back (ipods).

1. If you do not brush your teeth for the full two minutes before the timers on your toothbrushes buzz, you will lose your ipods.
2. If you speak to each other in an unkind way, you will lose your ipods.
3. If you speak to each other kindly but then roll your eyes or cross your fingers thinking no one saw either of these tricks we totally invented when we were kids, you will lose your ipods.
4. If you don’t make your beds (with hospital corners) you will lose your ipods.
5. If you dig into the tickle trunk and wear feather boas around the house and do not pick up all of the little fluffer nutters you leave in a trail of feathery madness on the carpet, you will lose your ipods.
6. If you do not do a better job explaining to me how to play Angry Birds on your ipods, you will lose your ipods.
7. If you, your children, or your children’s children, ever come to the dinner table and say “Ooh gross!” You will lose your ipods. All of you.
8. If you walk from the shower, through the bedroom, down the hallway, soaking wet, claiming you didn’t know you had to use a towel, you will lose your ipods.
9. If you read over my shoulder while I write about you losing your ipods, you will lose your ipods.
10. If you lose your ipods, you will….lose….your ipods.