Snake Charmer….

Yesterday started like any other day.

The Tooth fairy rocked Ellie’s world leaving her a watch “WITH REAL NUMBERS!!!!” for her very first lost tooth, the baby slammed her hands on the computer chair shouting for “Elmo eo’s!” which are videos starring Elmo.

I made my oatmeal-mo, drank my steeped tea-mo and let Elmo dictate where the day would take us including how we would speakmo and then, something out of the ordinary happened.

My neighbour (and friend) called in hysterics begging for help. Having heard a car was stolen in our neighbourhood earlier this week and a second stolen car was dumped on another neighbour’s driveway I was sure this was going to be epic.

“Liz! There’s a snake in my living room!”

“Who is this?” (and did she say “snake-mo?”)

“Please get Greg and ask him to come and OH MY GOD ! OH MY GOD! OH MY FREAKIN’ GOD!” AHHHH!!! Help!”

“Um Greg? Sharon’s on the phone and is in need of some assistance.”

Off he went, eager to be the hero but very aware that a) this could be a joke and b) we just watched a program about this rare type of snake that spit venom at its prey and blinded humans with its saliva so he practiced keeping his gaze low while sprinting to the house known only as “that place we’ll never visit again.”

 Things at Sharon’s house were beyond hysterical. Sharon’s youngest daughter had stepped on the dark, striped snake coiled on their dark, hardwood floors thinking it was her older brother’s rubber toy. Her older brother also thought it was one of his toys but after closer inspection (and watching it slither away) realized it wasn’t in fact from his collection and was not running on battery power. They all screamed and quickly lost sight of the unwelcome intruder.

I’m sure they could have found the snake in time and handled things themselves but it’s tough to engage fully in an animal search when also dealing with your own soiled pants so this is one of those instances when calling a neighbour makes sense.

Through a series of leaps in the air, losing the snake under furniture, turning the hot air to A/C thinking cold air might blow him into the middle of the room they eventually found him in the long fibres of the area rug in the living room and scooped him up.

Greg sent the picture to the Conservation Authority while talking to them on the phone. After being told while the colouring was similar to a python (that’s right, a python!) it was more likely a common water snake with a rare colour pattern.)

He decided to have a little fun with Sharon.

Greg: So, you say there are likely a lot more that hatched at the same time somewhere in the house?

Conservation Authority: Sir, I didn’t say that.

Sharon: WHAT?????????

Greg: Could be poisonous?

Conservation A: No! Sir!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *