Ellie waited anxiously at the door for her play date to arrive with two, small bowls of Swiss cheese crackers. They’re kind of a big deal in our house and reserved for the most important play dates with refined, kids’ palates.

I suggested her friend might not need to eat the crackers as she walked up the front steps, before taking off her coat but Ellie insisted that was how to be a good host.

Ok.

Ellie warned me, “Mommy, my friend can’t be around any dogs or cats because she’s allergic and she’ll break out and stuff so we can’t let her anywhere near any cats or any dogs, okay?”

Phew—we have neither so we dodged a bullet there.

Ellie: Can I wait at the front door Mom?

Me: Sure.

Five minute time lapse.

Ellie: Mom, can I wait outside the front door like outside on the front porch?

Me: Well that’s probably not a good idea without shoes and a coat.

Ellie: Ok but I’m going to test the doorbell to be sure it works.

Good idea because you might miss her walking towards you and if the bell doesn’t work either, she may never get her Swiss cheese crackers before removing her shoes or be able to pet our imaginary dog “Barkley” or cats, “Sminky” and “Furball.”

Our guest has arrived. Doorbell test—success.

Friend: Ellie, do you still have all of your Hallowe’en candy?

We can’t be the only ones.

Ellie: Yep, all of it.

Friend: Can we have some?

Ellie: You have to ask my Mom.

Friend: You ask her.

Ellie: No, you ask her.

And so on. And so on. And so on. And….

This conversation was really distracting. The kids obviously couldn’t see I was busy grooming the dog. They said he was a non-shedding, figment of my imagination but my scratched floors would say otherwise.

Would you believe he chewed through my non-existent slippers?