My twelve year old has accumulated a healthy stack of gift cards for stores at the mall over the years.

 
I think they have been used to steady a table, as trading cards with her sisters, toothpicks, but never at the actual mall to purchase anything.

 
Hanna has been asking if she can use some of “her own money” (I use quotes because how can one have any money of their own if they’ve never worked?) to go to the mall and buy something.

 
I agreed to take her because a) it was raining, b) it got me out of taking Chloe to hip-hop and c) I wanted to see how this experiment would play out.

 
She collected her gift cards from various toy bins, purses and door stops around the house along with coupons she had collected for soap, lotions and spritzes from Bath & Bodyworks and we headed out on our shopping adventure.

 
The first thing she bought is ironically also the first on her list of “Things you can’t eat with braces”—popcorn.

 
She used a coupon and bought two bags for the price of one. I hope her Orthodontist offers the same deal when we make the appointment to replace her bent wires.

 
But then something happened. The mood changed and the excitement of spending up her gift cards was thwarted by her own realization, “Mom, do you know now expensive stuff is at the mall?”

 
I DO!

 
Suddenly all of the begging for Frappuccinos over the past few months started swirling around in an emotional-soy-smoothie machine. “Does it really cost $6 for a Frappuccino every time we go?”

 
YES! YES IT DOES! It’s an insane ask for a kid to make! “Mom, can you buy me the most expensive milkshake on the planet which may or may not be loaded with caffeine, then I’ll lick off the whipped cream and hand you my cup while groaning, ‘I’m full, you can have the rest.’”

 
She looked at the crystal prisms/pyramids (?) dangling from fishing line and agreed her bedroom could do without $50 worth of rainbow-seizures if it meant holding onto the gift card for something she might really want or need.

 
She pulled out a coupon for hand lotion (note: she already has enough hand lotion on a shelf in her closet to last seven lifetimes and moisturize every household if we made a domino trail from our house to the mall) and said, “Whoa! Did you know you have to spend $30 before you even get 10% off? That’s like three bucks but you have to spend $30 to get it!”

 
Is this really happening? Now we’re doing math?!

 
This might be the best day of my life.

 
She did buy a miniature Zen garden (baby steps). The kind every kid’s desk needs.

The one with the sand and the Buddha and the tiny, little wooden rake.

 
I think we just found our new toothpick.