Hanna was assigned an end-of-year-we’ve-run-out-of-things-to-test grade two project to be completed at home.
She was asked to assemble a boat made from household items that could hold at least 100 pennies before sinking. The boat that held the most pennies would be awarded the highest class honour—a certificate of authenticity before recycling the repurposed products used to assemble it.
I picked Hanna up from school as I do each day and one of the little girls lugging a giant boat-like object under her arm was quick to blurt out, “Hanna’s boat won! Hanna’s boat won!”
When I saw Hanna she was delightedly pink as she skipped down the hallway towards the pick-up parents.
Here’s how I suspect her acceptance speech might have gone.
“I would first like to thank my Dad for designing, constructing, agonizing, drawing, revising and ultimately assembling my boat while I got caught up on the newest episode of The Suite Life of Zach and Cody. I should also thank Costco for selling pretzels in gigantic, plastic jugs, no other seven year olds’ boat could rival because it was going to hold 1600+ pennies without sinking regardless of what they used as a base. Thirdly and most importantly, I want to thank the other students especially those who actually worked on this project and the one that used several colourful popsicle sticks and other seven year old inspiration to prepare and showcase their boat which happened to sink the minute the first penny set sail on its bow. Your boat wouldn’t hold water to the thirty-nine year old dreamer frantically paddling an all-nighter to bring my boat to the regatta. Better luck next year.”
